Friday, July 20, 2007

Planning Commission Meeting, July 19

AP attended the planning commission meeting last night, and today AP has been searching the internet for legal psychotropic drugs to try and re-create the experience. It was a grueling 5 hours, and in typical city fashion the items that nobody was there to speak about were first on the agenda and the items that everyone was there for were last.

Here are the abridged minutes:

7:07: call to order

7:08-8:48: debate and hear testimony about 3 bills that affect, literally, only Eastport. One bill affected one single street, another was the result of one business sign. Some of these bills may have been given a favorable reading, perhaps some unfavorable, perhaps some were tabled until next meeting---I wasn't really paying attention because I hadn't had any coffee.

8:49-8:54: 5 minute break

8:54: commission begins to hear testimony on 2 am liquor license zoning rules

summary of above testimony:
Ward 1 residents:
-drunk people urinate on our flower pots
-there is no right to fair zoning
-more drinking = more problems
- blah blah blah ward 1 sector study blah blah
-ward 1 sector study was good
-we spent a lot of money on our houses
-we will be happy if downtown businesses close up and move to parole (no BS folks, this is totally true)

Bar Owners, concerned citizens, government watchdogs, other dilettantes:
-current zoning rules are arbitrarily unfair
-some licenses can't even APPLY, REPEAT: APPLY, for a 2 am
-have police enforce the laws about public intoxication
-hire more freegin' police
-ward 1 sector study is outdated
-get your facts straight on how many bars would be affected

11:41: public testimony on this bill ends

11:42: many people are dizzy, portraits on wall seem to come alive

11:43: commission recommends unfavorable position on 2 am zoning bill

11:44: many leave in a hurry, trying to make last call

11:51 (est) adjournment